Fear of Intimacy - How to Overcome It and Have a Closer Relationship

Would you describe your relationship as intimate?

You may be thinking of sex, which is definitely an intimate act, but not the definition of intimate.

It's almost a cliche that men fear intimacy, but it's not always true and it doesn't have to be for you.

While men may have a bit more trouble with sharing their inner feelings than women, women are not immune to it.

Do you even want intimacy?

Some couples are comfortable having a more superficial relationship. They relate on a more surface level and seem to be happy with that. If you are in that place and are thinking something is missing, it's likely that you are missing a deeper level of connecting.

How to define true intimacy:

• Personal conversations on a regular basis
• Mutual trust
• Ability to rely on each other's confidentiality
• A deep emotional connection
• Emotional exposure
• Both people open - become vulnerable

People desire closeness to different degrees.

Those who want it and go after it are happier and better adjusted in their marriage and in their work.

How to develop intimacy:

1. Use our feelings for good - we need to identify our feelings and be able to express them. In addition, if your partner is able to express their feelings to you it's important not to judge them or criticize them. By accepting them you enter into a deeper understanding of each other.
   
2. Self-awareness - Once you can understand your feelings, thoughts, needs, and behaviors you are much closer to being able to understand those of your partner. Being able to share these with your lover builds closeness. This awareness should help you be in tune with others needs and is the opposite of being self-absorbed. Becoming attuned to ourselves may show us that that there are changes that need to be made, which will help negative behaviors as well.
3. Compassion and empathy - Showing empathy means being able to experience "walking in their shoes", not just being sympathetic to them. Your partner will feel like you really understand them and are there for them. You may need to work on learning and practicing true empathy. It calls for you to be genuine, really listen to your partner and not be judgmental. It really can be learned and you will be able to be compassionate when your partner needs it.

You may have to work hard at getting intimate with your partner.

It takes practice. A willing heart and attitude goes a long way. If you are craving more closeness and connectedness in your relationship, it is worth working on it.

Maybe you feel like you are the only one trying?

That you're just not getting through to your partner? Follow this link: 50 Secrets to learn how to reconnect with your lover no matter how stubborn or distant they are and no matter how hopeless or difficult your situation seems. We have helped thousands develop a close and intimate relationship with their loved one.